The six months before seeing Josh were very hard, especially the first 3 months after I returned to Bolivia.
Although Josh did a great job at keeping in touch through email (in fact, he did better than me), I missed spending time with him, listening to him. When I was in St. Louis, we usually met in the evenings, so I had the chance to ask him how his day was. He would tell me about what was going on in his job, and although I did not understand 100% of it, I was glad to hear him. The best part was seeing the way he said things, his face, his expressions. By email, I did not have that. I tried imagining how his voice would sound, if he was sad or happy, but it was not the same.
And I had fears… I was afraid he would forget me. I was afraid because I know he likes being busy, and because he is a friendly guy and has a good social life. I was afraid he would get enough to fill the emptiness of my presence with other things. Here, my memory of him was vivid. I had tons of pictures of him I took with my camera. I would look at them almost every day. I also had a basket where I put prayer requests, and I had some about him. I was always thinking about him, asking God to help us until we would meet again.
But now, he is here. I held him tight when I first saw him at the airport, because I didn’t want to lose him. And he has been here four weeks so far. During this time I have had the chance to learn new things about him and we both have had new experiences. I like it when I wake up and I know I am going to have breakfast with him. He taught me how to make cinnamon toast, and I like it. Also, he has tried different Bolivian breakfasts and he has survived. In the mornings we either work or visit a place. Then we have lunch time, where we cook soup from a bag or have leftovers. In the afternoons we always work in my oasis-office. It is a time when I try not to disturb him because he is so immersed in his work. Then in the evenings, we either cook, or eat out, or visit a friend.
Also, we are learning how to manage disagreements. My mom thinks we disagree on silly things… like I thought Terminator 1 was better than Terminator 2, when Josh thinks the second movie was a masterpiece… O well, maybe I shouldn’t even mention that incident so we won’t raise the topic again. But I like it when it happens because I am reminded that we come from different homes and different cultures. And it is good we experience this and learn now when we are single.
It has been four days since he asked me to marry him. In addition to that joy, now I am going to have him for one more week than I thought. I feel like the most blessed woman of the world. There is just a hint of sadness… it is saying goodbye. I know I will miss him again, and I know the first months will be the hardests. But now he has given me a bigger hope, and our joy will be bigger next time we meet because we will become husband and wife. So here we are, ready to see what God has for our lives.